from Connie Palmen's The Friendship

 

from her imaginary dissertation: "show me your addiction and i will show you your forbidden language" i got a bit confused but i think her idea is that addiction distinguishes a person either through the mind or the body, "addition is a forbidden language. the person addicted to alcohol have trouble with expression through speech, the forbidden language of the drunkard is the language of the body." and then she goes into distinction vs fate. friendship is a chosen commitment, just like addiction is, but it's too unreliable. so you choose drink, food etc:

 

"All addictions are attempts to satisfy the longing for friendship without being dependent on another living soul. Addiction is the hunger for the distinction of being a friend without having to go through the drama of dependence with real people and without living in constant fear of that friendship ending. People who eat or drink too much make themselves dependent on something that is always available and that will never let them down. It is a chosen companionship, with the promise of an everlasting bond. To be addicted is to long for the ties of family, for escape from the demands made by a life of self-determination... the damage of addiction lies in that each addict damages his own means of temptation by giving in to it. Addicts crave what cannot be self-administered... Addiction is friendship without a friend. "