And yet, having held you in my company so long, I find I do have something to give you. Not the mysterious, intimate and consoling data you would have wished, but something to go on with, and in all likelihood the best I can do. It is simply the fact, as you go down the stairs and walk in dark streets, as you see forms, as you marry or speak sharply or wait for a train, as you begin imagination, as you look at every mark, simply the fact of my eyes in your back.

Anne Carson, Plainwater.

learning to see it as a gift not a curse is a way to live, love, and laugh again. of my nine years of penance i have now sleepwalked through four. the next five may be no less difficult, but perhaps i will go through them with brighter sight and gentler touch.