i went into the kitchen to get something to eat and joe fleming, the chap who lives across the hall, comes striding in holding two test tubes with stoppers. he handed one to me. ants, he announced. and indeed the test tubes were full of enormous red ants scrabbling about anxiously. they're from utah, he added. i looked at the neatly-printed label on the tube: CAUTION poisonous. are you... experimenting on them? i asked, trying to remember if joe is working in any of the biological sciences. no, they're pets, he said, greatly surprised. oh! er. you're starting a insectarium? yes it's a gift, he says, taking the test tube back from me and opening the fridge. should you be putting ants in the fridge? i asked, in equal parts concernd about the well-being of the ants and the hygiene conditions of our refrigerator. oh they're fine, he says, sticking the test tubes in the egg compartment, this will just slow them down a little. i am doubtful but i suppose he is free to do that, only i hope no one picks the tubes up accidentally and drops them in fright, shattering glass all over the floor and letting loose a plague of CAUTION poisonous ants on harvard.