now that going to beijing is out of the question i wonder what i'll do with the year off. hadn't really thought about it - i simply assumed i *would* be living in beijing for 6 months and taking lots and lots of literature classes and going to museums and theatres every week. hah. mom said don't even think about going for a year. so. i suppose i would get some relief teaching work, but that would only be sporadic work. i wonder whether anyone would want a research assistant.

i suppose i could just worry about getting into some grad school or other. hm.

and poach, the clever girl, has learnt to drive! maybe that's what i can do in the year off then. hah. probably will fail the test 3 or 4 times too. if only driving a car were like riding a bicycle, just a bigger one. i feel weird here that i can't drive. not that i want to but - it seems like something everyone can do and, like poach's examiner said to her, makes them "real persons". only at home it's so normal not to know how to drive you never really think about it. not that i'll ever need to at home, especially not now that the northeast line will be running soon. no more changing! straight train to dhoby ghaut! haha. will probably start watching movies at plaza sing more. plaza sing! haven't - said the name for so long. i think - that's the kind of thing that ties you to a place, or is proof of it - that - you have the map of it in your head - you know it by the buildings and landmarks and train stations and bus routes and underpasses less than 3 weeks left to catch up on classes (HEAPS to do), finish other papers, take exams, PACK.

it's mostly books anyway and clothes. everything else is edible. i don't even have any furniture, except one standing lamp that emma said she'll keep for me. oh! i don't have furniture at all! that is SO liberating! everything belongs to the university, and everything else that belongs me, is books! i wonder if someone can drive me to the post office to send all my books home. i'm not going to ask bob he's already done way too much for me and he needs to work on his dissertation well, i'll figure it out. somebody also needs to tell me about the parable of the unjust steward.