i wish paramedics wouldn't ask you for the date. i never can remember the date even at the best of times and should not like to be bundled off to hospital as a concussed case because i hem and haw under questioning - admittedly i did fall down an escalator just before that, but they could just as well have asked what century it was (of the fruitbat of course) or how many songs there were in astrophil and stella (11. that fact seems to have stuck in my mind from the time of the exams.)

it didn't hurt as much as the time i was pitched by a malevolent chair and was taken to the emergency room but i'm rather aching. it was that wretched blackcurrant juice i keep buying, you see, they come in 2 gallon bottles and a few of those in a shopping bag can drag you a long way if you found yourself falling down an escalator.