i rang home at 8 in the morning. they've had a busy past three days - preparing for today - the funeral is today - and i'm going to stay up and wait through it - and then i'll call my parents when it's over. winnie chose the readings and the hymns - my dad will be reading from isaiah 25:6 and aaron will read from 2 corinthian 5 - and the hymns are amazing grace, abide with me, and on the paten. winnie and juliet will give the eulogies - my dad asked winnie to let him have the text afterwards, so that he can email it to me. everything is scheduled - at 12 they will go to singapore casket and there will be a brief prayer there and then the coffin will be moved to immaculate heart. then the funeral mass, and then to the crematorium - the one at mount vernon i imagine, and then those who have remained till that point will be taken to three babas where cousin alan has undertaken to provide the reception. everyone has something to do - they're so busy performing a part for the funeral - that they don't need to feel yet - whereas i feel redundant and helpless right now.