oh my darlings! i was looking through old mails trying to find a remark choonping made about his army posting and found instead from von:

"only 3 mths, 26 days and 12 hours to go before i escape the army. this week has been particularly hilarious. 83 people went to see the complex doctor for food poisoning and they declared an epidemic situation and called us in to investigate at 11pm on sunday night, a trifling 53 hours after the incident occurred. so i got in rather grumpy with my notebook and pencil all ready to record 80-plus statements only to find that, with the customary efficiency of the army, 82 of the victims had been granted home leave leaving the investigation team a grand total of one diarrhoea-stricken private from whom to wring an excruciatingly precise account of the unhygienic condition of the cookhouse. so we gave up and drove out for dinner while the medical types ran around like headless chickens taking water samples and things of that nature. this is supposedly all v hush-hush and they're probably reading my email so i can't really mention again how incompetent they are."