A Duel to the Death

Peepiceek:

peepiceek, by the gift of god, by prescription, by election and by love, third lord of su-lin's heart and lord of the tissue box, to vaughn, previously recipient of astronomical english marks and now styling himself guardian of the written epistle and CAPITALISER, GREETINGS.
IT IS MY PLEASURE TO VENTURE MY MOUSE IN CLEAN WAGER OF BATTLE TO PROVE UPON YOUR PERSON THAT ALL SENTENCES ISSUING FROM MINE PAWS MUST NOT BE DEFIED, DISREGARDED OR IN ANY WAY DESECRATED. IT MAY PLEASE YOUR LORDSHIP TO NOTE YOUR CONVENIENCE HAS ALREADY BEEN CONSIDERED IN THE USE OF CAPITALS.
THEREFORE WE MOST HEARTILY PROPOSE THAT THE SAID COMBAT AND DEFIANCE SHALL REST UPON YOUR CONVENIENCE, AND THE EARLIEST REPLY THEREOF. I DO NOT DOUBT YOUR COURAGE IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY AND MOST PLEASURABLY AWAIT YOUR GIVING ME THE SATISFACTION OF BATTLE.

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